Sketsa Kecil

I just met him no more than a year ago. Never crossed my mind at that time that I am going to be so close to him.

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He might looks cold from outside, unreachable, has unspeakable plans which sometimes seems hard to understand but what lies beneath are so much different.

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He doesn’t mind bringing some food for dinner for his family, he even buys snacks for them almost every night. Those were the first things I learnt about him and I already put respect for him because of those two simple things that others might thought as nothing. For me, it is not merely nothing. It is a reflection of responsibility, a life value I expect the most from a man.

I remember a nice quote from William Wordsworth: ‘the best portion of a good man’s life is his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love.’

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He was so much different with ‘someone who gave half my blood’. He rarely speaks, but every member of his family listens to him when he does. He is rarely in rage. He never throw things or yell when he is in one. He kept his in silence yet we already know what he means. I feel emotionally secure with him.

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He doesn’t mind picking me up at the hospital at night or in rain. He often drops me to the hospital in the morning. He doesn’t mind carrying my stuff, helping me arranging my farewell party, and he is willing to ask about my difficulties dealing with people in the convent. I feel physically secure with him.

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Time goes by and I am getting to know him a little deeper. I rarely find him at home at daytime, even when he is working on night shift, but it’s because he is doing his side job. He literally tears his physic for his family and he is so humble about it. He never brags and he never underestimates people who tears their body while working. He appreciates the spirit. He sees people deeper, not in a shallow way I usually do.

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He does everything for his family. He works under the sun and so his skin goes darker. Opung who hasn’t seen him for 8 years said to him like this, “I remember you, but you are a lot darker now.” Some people might value lighter skin more, but I value his dark skin more than anything. I almost shed my tears when Opung said so, yet I felt so proud for I thought it was a moment of compliment. His dark skin is a reflection of hard work, a precious life value that I put respect for.

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He observes people… that is one thing I learnt about him when he accompanied me on my trip to go back to Jakarta for good about 3 days ago. Others might thought he doesn’t care for his nephews who lives near him, but actually he’s watching them invisibly. He speaks when he thought their actions were out of line. When we were having dinner in a near-midnight after visiting his sister-in-law, he commented on some customers around us. He told me that people on our left is probably from military background, that the woman on our 11 o’clock doesn’t stop talking on her cell phone from the beginning until she left the restaurant, and so on. So then I know that he observes people in his silence… and I thought he does me too.

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He respects people… I really should learn this value from him. He knows the truth about my relationship with ‘someone who gave half my blood’s family. But when we went there, he even kissed my grandma’s hand. It was such an unexpected act! Later when I asked him what his reasons were, he said it’s simply an act of respect. And suddenly I was so ashamed of myself for being reluctant to respect others.

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My mom asked me yesterday, if he ever asked about my father.

Then I said, he already knows.

What did you tell him? – my mom asked.

I said, I told him as it is.

She was a little shocked, ‘As it is? So I guess he didn’t respect me anymore, did he?’

I asked her why she thought so.

“Because of what I have done.”

Then I assured her, “Of all the people I know, he’s one of the wisest. I’m sure he sees thing deeper, not only on the surface. He sees the reasons, not just the actions.”

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I haven’t known him much, but so far, all I can say is I adore him. I wish ‘someone who gave half my blood’ has half the quality he has.. only half would be enough to make my family live happily, although now we are also happy on ourselves.

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Actually I kinda envy his family. They are so lucky to have a father figure like him. And I think, I am lucky too… at least I’m lucky to know him this far, to share some of his life experiences, and to share his precious life values I should also have myself. I am grateful for ever knowing such a great person like him, also thankful for his being so kind to me, and thankful for his willingness to ‘treat me like his own daughter’ just like he said to my mom without considering my family background.

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This article is a tribute to him… a great person with a gentle and loving soul inside.